Its been nearly a month since I posted here. I think I've been struggling with what to write. On the one hand I thought that doing an annoynymous blog would be great cause I could talk about issues I face as a police officers wife. On the other hand I still have to be just as censored in order to not connect our two "lives". The family life where we don't advertise my spouses occupation and the one where we show pictures, talk about our kids, go out and do fun things together etc. I'm going to try though. I'll give you as an authentic account of our lives as I can. We'll just have to see how this all works out. Maybe I really do need two blogs. I can't really say that I know.

The other reason for not blogging is that I haven't really had a lot of our police family issues and things to talk about. My husband was very furtunate to delay some parental leave time so we've been enjoying a number of weeks with him home. We still stay connected with our force life and family as its impossible to truly get away but we haven't had to deal with late night phone calls, washing uniforms and making lunches.

Washing uniforms. That makes me think of a funny experience I had shortly after we were married. I went to what the dear husbands (DH) dry clean only uniform pants. We lived too far away from a dry cleaner and I was too cheap to pay for something I thought that I could get away with doing myself at home. I quickly discovered though that this was a recipe for disastor. My poor husband had to sheepishly go in to work and ask if he was allowed to order some more winter work pants. I had accidentally left them in the dryer to long and they had totally shrunk. They were pulling apart at the seams...kinda unraveling with strings everywhere and there was just no way to smooth out the material. Apparently these were the "you only get to order them every two years" pants. Thankfully he was able to get another pair so he didn't have to go cold for the winter.

I'm okay with making mistakes. I'm not okay with what other people think of me though when I make them. I know, I know... I'm sure no other woman out there has the "fear of man" or ever thinks about what other people think of them. I've always been really concerned about what kind of a reputation I have with the other officers, families and staff. Am I the annoying wife who calls all the time? The one who everyone thinks is dragging their police member down? Or am I the one that they know they can count on to watch their kids, make goodies for the office and when push comes to shove pretty well bend over backwards for my husband's career....I hope I'm the latter. I always hope that people know I am supportive of my husband and my heart is completely for his work family.

But I guess it really comes down to making sure that my husband knows I'm his number one fan. What everyone else thinks of me is none of my business.